US Betting on Paris Hilton as Most Important News in the Country

'World awaits Paris Hilton's Return' was a lead article by the prestigious Associated Press on June 25, 2007.

Why should this be news? I will tell you why. On Tuesday, the Federal Aviation Administration promised to keep a close watch on the paparazzi helicopter pilots expected to track her every move once she is released from jail. The police in fashionable Hollywood Hills have erected 'No Parking' signs and painted 'No Parking Zones' in front of Paris Hilton?s home.

This is important news that all of the media is sure to be covering. This ad nauseum coverage, capped by an hour-long interview on Larry King Live this Wednesday, which Michael Moore was bumped for, will certainly not be the last coverage of this earth-shattering event. In addition, to be sure, Fox News will give as much coverage to this as they did for Anna Nicole Smith, and far more than they cover anything of importance.

There were even many bets featured by offshore sportsbooks on who Paris Hilton would allow her first interview, on if she would commit suicide while on the inside, on whether her mom would pull strings to get her out of jail early, etc.

But, I must admit there is little else going on in the world that should be reported on. The war in Iraq is old news. Genocide in Darfur is not worthy of attention. Misuse of government by the Bush Administration goes unnoticed; New Orleans has lost its press appeal. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales' inability to lead the Justice Department effectively, or to tell the truth, does not garner any one's interest. Illegal wire tapping? Not news.

Of course, there is Dick Cheney, the Vice President of the United States, and his declaration this week that he is not part of the Executive Branch of Government, effectively saying that he reports to no one. However, this has gotten its 15 minutes of press and no longer qualifies as news.

There is no uproar by the people over the damaging effects sanctions by various countries will have on the U.S. economy regarding its violation of World Trade Organization Treaties the U.S. has signed.

What is the point of even complaining? There is no market in the United States for issues that may have a dramatic effect on the lives of millions of people worldwide. All we care about is the upcoming presidential election and stargazing at other peoples lives that live in more riches than our own.

It is so important for us to know how much a movie made in its debut weekend and how our hard-earned money helped those who made it or starred in it, richer, that we see no need to explore matters that affect real people, in real time.

The important quote of the day, are you ready for it? It is one that hits home with me, it can change my life in ways that I never could have foreseen, it will enrichen my life and make me a better person, It will get me to stand up and be heard, because before today, I really didn't know the meaning of life. I would like to thank Kathy Hilton, Paris' mom for this gem "she doesn?t like orange anymore. She can't wait to get that orange suit off."

So to all the fashion designers, retail outlets and shoppers, let this be a warning to you. If it is orange, it won't sell! For those of you that stocked up on orange things, find a lawyer to help you go into bankruptcy before its too late. Orange will not even sell at Halloween time.

June 26, 2007
Posted By Tom Jones
Staff Editor, CasinoGamblingWeb.com    Previous Page | Internet Gambling | Top Online Casinos | Submit News!